broken-face-liz

This was where the broken things went: empty bottles, crumpled packets, shattered needles. They piled up in the mud and the long grass, hidden away under the bridge where nobody would have to see them.

There were people there too with their cans of spray paint and stolen cigarettes, making their marks upon the dingy underside of the world. Most of them were young, little Orpheus darting down into the Underworld for a night. They sprayed their symbols on the cement wall, making a tapestry of filth.

Others were older. There was no crossing the river again for them.


Word Count: 100

This is for Friday Fictioneers. Thanks to Rachel Wisoff-Fields for running the challenge and Liz Young for providing the prompt photo! 

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Comments
  1. A yes, the homeless everyone has forgotten, living in a world of their own down there.

    Just one suggestion: This was the broken things went…
    This sentence is passive construction. you could save words, if you needed to, by using the active voice: Broken things go here… (or went—or landed up— here.)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you! I just missed out the word “where.”

    Liked by 1 person

  3. They piled up in the mud and the long grass – this could be said of both the detritus and the people. Very nicely done.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I enjoyed your story. I like where you took the photo prompt. I could see a visual in the way the story unfolded. Nicely done 😊
    Isadora ğŸ˜Ž

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Dale says:

    This was gritty and real… I really enjoyed it, though the subject is a difficult one

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Michael Wynn says:

    A great description of the debris of life and society building up unseen and the lmost silent despair of it all

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Keigh Ahr says:

    Like the classical reference.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Liz Young says:

    Those youngstes had better be very careful not to get sucked in permanently.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. gahlearner says:

    This feels very realistic (and cold), and the step from flirting with life’s underbelly to landing there for good is a short one. Great descriptions.

    Liked by 1 person

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